Apparently I’m not Superwoman

I know, what a shocker to me too.  I thought with all my cavewoman ways and the fact that I haven’t had so much as a common cold in 3 1/2 years that I had become indestructible.

But reality hits. Started with a scratchy throat…the usual…so I jacked up the nutrient dense foods and extra vitamins C, D and Echinacea.  Except it turns out I have strep which equals the worst sore throat ever! It’s been 4 days and I can’t eat and can’t barely drink…it’s like shards of glass when I swallow even water. Antibiotics aren’t kicking in yet. I’m frustrated.  Ear ache, teeth hurt, swollen glands and tired all the time…how fun!

Ensure – surely not good for you

I tried the usual pain narcotics like Vicodin, but hate the goofy useless feeling I get.  A friend got me a case of Ensure…I drank it out of desperation for some calories and nutrition, but it made me feel bad and then I looked at the ingredients…it’s a bottle of sugar and soy with I guess a One-A-Day inside. I really appreciate her going out of her way to get it, but I have to get some nutrition in my body. So I’m having smoothies with protein powder and fruit…no, still not Paleo, but it’s the only thing that’s giving me some calories and making me feel a little human…Smoothie King and Bolthouse!  Last night I tried some ground beef with eggs all chopped up really small and I couldn’t eat it…well now I have leftovers I’ll try again later.  Wishing I had some bone broth or some kind of healthy soup prepared for times like this.  I’m 3 pounds down so far and I don’t want to lose any weight.  I’ll need ankle weights to hold me down soon!

Much better choices!

Although I’m still wallowing in my pity party out of frustration…I realized I have to let the healing run its course or find a different doctor, different medicine or some miracle shot. I am all for it right now.  I am hungry.  I am not Superwoman. I can’t get well in a couple of days, it could take a few more days or a couple of weeks and I just have to take one step at a time.  Back to snuggling up with the dogs and cats on the couch and watching football; back to texting and having one-sided phone conversations…waiting because I know tomorrow will be a much better day.

“That’s Not Paleo!”

So at work this week, we had our monthly birthday cake and ice-cream gathering in the kitchen.  All I can smell is the sugar from the cakes and it doesn’t even smell good to me anymore.  We sing Happy Birthday and leave to go back to my desk.  Someone asks me, “Aren’t you going to have a piece?”.  And I say with disgust, “No indeed!”…I want a huge grass-fed ribeye for my birthday!  I now realize I think I might be a health food snob!  Oh no!

But I’ve found I really want people to be healthy; know what I know!  I want to help, but is it coming across that way?  I find myself looking at people’s carts at the grocery, even Whole Foods, and judging what’s in their carts.  I somehow find it hard to believe people still buy things in a box!  Cereal? Yuck. Milk? Quinoa? Pasta?…now they know that’s not Paleo, right?  They don’t know about GMOs and why to buy grass-fed beef and pastured chickens and eggs?  How could they not, I talk about it all the time?  And why is anyone still drinking and eating out of BPA filled plastic bottles and containers? Eww.  Gluten and grains, really?…it will destroy you!  They don’t even know the difference between Omega 3 and Omega 6?  Don’t they know if they just do Paleo for 30 days they will feel great.  I say or think all this.  I think about these things while I’m listening to the Robb Wolf podcasts, cooking my pastured eggs and grass-fed burger in bacon fat, while rubbing coconut oil on my body after I cooked my broccoli in it! And I talk the foodie talk with other people I got to do Paleo, like they’ve been doing it forever too. We can’t figure out why everyone isn’t just jumping on our band wagon! We have a “language” now.

Oh and I’m the same at the gym.  Really, people who look like hamsters on wheels on those cardio machines for an hour are annoying.  I look at those wimpy guys who have been working out for months and I lift heavier than they do…makes me want to scream.  And the people who look the same after a year of working out 5 days a week when I have transformed in the same time…how have they not figured it out?…I’m not performing miracles!  I eat Paleo and weight train…it’s easy!

Or is it?

I can laugh at myself for what I say with no regret, but I realize I am never going to change the way people eat or exercise by judging them or making them feel guilty.  I truly do want to help and I want them to see my results and know they can be healthy and happy too.  I need to get people to be excited about food and health; bring them into my conversations and ask me questions.  So I will be patient and remember the long journey I had also; that it took a long time for that lightbulb to go off for me.  I will be ready to answer if they ask.